When I am upset, I tell it out loud to that person.
When I am angry, I yell my heart out to that person.
When I am hurt, I keep quiet. And it's not for everyone, If some X,Y,Z has hurt me then I kind of make sure to give them a taste of their own medicine. But, When its someone who is very close to my heart, I keep quiet or just stop being in touch with them for sometime. Its not because I have a grudge against them, Its because healing takes time.
Then, the second stage happens where I need to remind myself that just like the person who have unknowingly hurt me, I may have done it to others too. Perhaps even knowingly, so why do I need to make a big fuss? These explanations sometimes work but I think mostly we all become a little partial when it comes to being in others shoes.
Third stage, What really matters? Would it be a big deal if I let go of this one hurtful thing few years from now? Its kinda funny how complicated human beings are.. with their lives, emotions, relations..They just learn by making mistakes. Sometimes, repeatedly.